Ahsoka's New Philosophy
by katierosefun
Summary: After going to a not-so-interesting philosophy class, Ahsoka Tano is ready to create her own philosophy and she shares it with her master. Unsurprisingly, Ahsoka's philosophy is a bit…chaotic. [Humor/crack.]


**Hello, everyone! It's been a while since I made a ****_Star Wars : The Clone Wars _****humor/crack one-shot, hasn't it? O.O**

**However, last night, I managed to whip something up - I've got a very strange suspicion that I was drinking a lot of soda or something that night, because this story is ****_purely crack. _****[For those of you guys who don't know, crack is basically a story that's not supposed to be taken seriously - especially since lots and lots of stupid, crazy, funny things happen in the story. XD Then again, I feel like more than half of my ****_Clone Wars _****stories are a ****_bit _****crack-ish...] **

**This was also inspired by ****_SkyguysSkygirl's _****video, ****_Ahsoka's New Philosophy, _****but due to what I ****_think _****might have been the ****_Google Plus _****and ****_Youtube _****integration, her channel lost a ****_lot _****of videos, including this one. However, I decided to ****_sort of _****put it up as a written story - or at least, a very, very loose form of it. **

***thinking* Am I gonna get flagged for this? O.O I hope not. **

_**Anyways**_**, without further ado, I give you one of the crackiest crack stories I have ever made! **

* * *

Ahsoka Tano was annoyed. Why had her master encouraged her to take a philosophy class again? It wasn't like Ahsoka really _need_ it – not now, anyways.

As predicted, Ahsoka wasn't very good with philosophy – the questions were too deep, the answers were too silly, and the teacher was beginning to get on her nerves.

"You are not committing yourself to the field of philosophy, young one," Master Vectra was saying in a calm, frustratingly quiet voice. "Open your mind."

No matter how hard Ahsoka tried, her mind wouldn't open. The fact that she was hot, tired and bored wasn't helping, either. Of course, Master Vectra just _had _to give her a less-than-decent score on last week's homework as well.

Ergh. Could this day get any worse?

When Master Vectra _finally _dismissed the class, Ahsoka was the first one to jump out of her seat. She bolted out of the room and ran into her shared quarters with her master, Anakin Skywalker.

The older man was sitting on the floor, casually throwing his light saber up in the air and catching it a minute later. He looked over at Ahsoka and gave her a small wave in greeting.

_You are not committing yourself to the field of philosophy, young one, _Master Vectra's words echoed around Ahsoka's head. She made a small, irritated scoffing sound.

Not committing herself? She had to sit in that room for nearly two and a half hours! If Ahsoka didn't know better, she'd say that _that alone _was commitment right there!

"Oh, yeah? That's what you think!" Ahsoka muttered under her breath, walking over to her bed.

Anakin looked up with a frown. "What?" He asked, confused.

Ahsoka paused before going on, "That's my new philosophy from now on. 'Oh, yeah? That's what you think!'"

"Well, why are you telling me?" Anakin asked, standing up.

"What?"

"_Why _are you telling me?"

Ahsoka frowned, tapping her chin thoughtfully. "_Why _are you telling me?" She asked out loud and grinned, snapping her fingers. "I like it! That's a good philosophy – why are you telling me? _Why _are you telling me?"

She turned to Anakin and placed her hands on her hips. "Why are you telling me? That's my new philosophy – the teacher gave a _D_ on last week's homework! She said, 'Miss Ahsoka Tano, you're grades are going down!' I could have told her –"

"Your new philosophy?" Anakin asked in a bored tone.

"My new philosophy!" Ahsoka nodded in agreement. She crossed her arms and imitated in Master Vectra's quiet, high-pitched voice, "Miss T?"

She returned to her normal voice, clasping her hands in front of herself. "I'm she!"

"Look see," Ahsoka switched to Master Vectra's voice, pretending to hold out a bit of paper.

"A _D_?" Ahsoka asked in her own voice.

"A _D_," 'Master Vectra' replied.

Ahsoka crossed her arms and shouted, "Well, why are you telling me?" She turned to Anakin with a triumphant smile. "And _that's _my new philosophy!"

Anakin sighed, standing up. "That's great, Snips, but I've got to go work on my fighter or something –"

"No!" Ahsoka shouted, waving her hands frantically. Her master could _not_ leave her alone here, especially since she was talking to him about her new philosophy!

She blinked and then grinned. "I like it! _No! _That's a good philosophy! _No! No! No!_"

Anakin threw up his hands in exasperation and said, "That's your new philosophy, huh?"

"Yes!" Ahsoka replied with a nod, and then, realizing what she had just said, quickly went on, "I mean no!"

Anakin rolled his eyes as Ahsoka turned back around, thinking up some more philosophies.

"Just like a busy bee, each new philosophy can fly from tree to tree and keep me moving!" She grinned, jumping up excitedly. "When life's a dizzy maze on alternating days, I'll choose a different phrase!"

"Your new philosophy?" Anakin asked, leaning against the wall.

"My new philosophy!" Ahsoka nodded enthusiastically.

"Ahsoka!" Anakin said, shaking his head. "Some philosophies are simple – _man cannot eat by bread alone! _And some philosophies are clear!"

"Leave your message at the sound of the tone?" Ahsoka offered.

"Some philosophies we can choose, deciding what goes on and some take a lifetime!" Anakin said, stretching out his hands.

"Mine take a minute!" The younger girl shouted cheerfully.

Anakin face palmed in reply. "But Ahsoka, anything that takes a minute _can't _be very lasting!"

"No!" Ahsoka protested, crossing her arms.

Anakin groaned and introduced his forehead to the wall. "I can't stand it!" He shouted indignantly.

"_I can't stand it!_" Ahsoka mimicked, rolling her eyes. She paused, testing out the phrase in her mouth. "_I can't stand it _– I like it! It's like a guarantee – my new philosophy – and things are sure to be a whole lot brighter!"

She shook her master's shoulder, jumping up and down whilst yelling, "_Oh, yeah? That's what you think!" _ and "_Why are you telling me?" _and "_No!_" and lastly, "_I can't stand it!" _

When her master didn't reply, she plopped down on her bed and continued, "Now life is free and easy, much more philosophy-zy with my brand new –"

She paused, pressing a hand to her face. "You know, someone once said that we should live every day as if it were the last day of our life."

This statement seemed to bring Anakin to life. He whirled around to face Ahsoka and shouted in an over-exaggerated voice, "Aaugh! Today's the last day! This is it! I only have one day left! Aaaaugh!"

Ahsoka smirked and flopped backwards in her bed, staring up at the ceiling. "Clearly, some philosophies aren't made for all _people_." She quickly sat up and grinned at her master. "And _that's _my new philosophy!"

She was promptly answered with a slam of the door.

It seemed that Anakin had finally had enough of Ahsoka's ramble.

_No matter, _Ahsoka thought to herself cheerfully. _I'll just have a bunch of new philosophies waiting for him when he returns._

* * *

**A/N: Again, I think I might have been high on sugar when I was writing this... **

**Ahsoka: Aren't you always high on sugar? **

**Me: ...just about, yeah. Maybe. I dunno. *****flaps hands around* I don't really know how to give one answer. Actually, I do - wait, no I don't. **

**Ahsoka: Can you talk without flapping your hands around? **

**Me: *continuing to flap hands around* Yes. *clasps hands* No. *points at Ahsoka* I'll get back to you on that. **

**Anakin: DOCTOR WHO REFERENCE HAHAHA **

**Ahsoka: ...you watch _Doctor Who _now? **

**Anakin: What? *whistles guiltily* I didn't say anything. **

**Ahsoka: ...*slaps forehead* OMIGOD. Review, give constructive criticism if you have any, and no flames! **

**Me: OMIGOD ANAKIN WATCHES _DOCTOR WHO_ OMIGOD OMIGOD OMI- **

**Ahsoka: Where's the off switch? **

**Anakin: No idea. **

**Me: OMIGOD OMI- **

**Ahsoka: *knocks me out with a light saber hilt* Found it. Goodbye, everyone!**


End file.
